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Ask Not

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Maria-"Hey, I think I know why Max and Tess were, you know, together last night. He was just playing bodyguard. He was walking her home in case the killer was following her."
Liz-"You know, you don't have to make excuses for him."
Maria-"Who's making excuses? I'm just trying to help him--help you.
You know, help the situation."
Liz-"Did he send you here?"
Liz-"He did, didn't he?"
Maria-"Not this time. I mean, no, of course not."
Liz-"Maria, I thought that you were my friend."
Maria-"This is so unfair. I care about you both. I just want guys to be happy and together."
Liz-"Maria, will you do me a favor?"
Liz-"Will you keep your big fat nose out of this?"
Maria-"Message received! Man!"
Liz-"Look, I've got a lot of work to do, so...................."
Maria-"Fine. Fine. You weren't serious about the big fat nose........."

Congresswoman Whittaker- "You ever been in love, Parker?"
CW-"He dumped you too?"
Liz-"Not exactly."
CW-"Why, you left him?"
Liz-"There was just someone else in his life."
CW-"But you go. girl !
Don't you let any man pull that crap on you, you know?"
CW-"Yeah. Who is this bitch who moved in on your man?"
Liz-"She's just someone-this girl from his past."
CW-"Uh..worst kind."
Liz-"You know, she's not that bad."
CW-"Yeah, right. Like you don't hate her."
Liz-"Um...maybe a little bit."
CW-"Uhuh. See, now let it out. The truth will set you free."
Liz-"Okay. I..I do...I HATE HER !!!"
CW-"That's more like it. Now, does this tramp have a name?"
Liz-"Oh, Tess."
CW-"Tess? What is that? I hate her already."
Liz-"I know."

Michael-"Yes sir. What do you wanna do next, fearless leader?"
Max-"We are NOT voting on this, Michael. I've made my decision. That is the end of it!"
Michael-"You know, Maxwell. I don't remember this other life we are supposed to have lived, but I do know I was your trusted 2nd in command and
I'm pretty damn sure you used to listen to me."

Max-"I'm supposed to be this...this great leader but I don't know how to make these kinds of decisions. I don't have that kind of insight.
How am I supposed to know what's the right course of action?"
Maria-"Hmmm........I have a thought. What ARE you talking about? Here, you're giving me a history lesson and you haven't even told me what the hell's going on, Max."
Max-"I know. I'm sorry. I'm just trying to figure out how to........"
Maria-"Yes. yes. You're trying to figure out how to be a leader. Alright. Here's a little insight. JFK...he's not so great. Cheated on his wife---with tramps. Uh.....oh.....Now,there's something you and Jack have in common. You're both involved with tramps.
How is Tess, by the way?"
Max-"I'm not involved with Tess."
Maria-"Just taking midnight strolls with her?"
Max-"You saw us?"
Maria-"Yeah. We saw you, as in Liz and I saw you together. Looked like a pretty romantic evening to me. Maybe a little patty cake on the front porch before you said goodnight?"
Max-"No. It's ju...........It's a long story."
Maria-"Well, I certainly don't want to hear a long story unless there's a Kennedy involved." Max-"I love Liz!"
Maria-"I know you love Liz, Max. You've been telling me that the entire summer. But now that she's back, I'm the one doing all the work here."
Max-"What am I supposed to do?"
Maria-"I don't know. Do something! Show her how you feel and please, please do it now! Look, I'm sorry. I know you're dealing with a Roswell missile crisis or something. Just follow your heart. Isn't that what all the great leaders do?"

Max-" Face him."
Michael-"And, if he kills you?"
Max-"Then you can be Fearless Leader."

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